Fear and Loathing in South Miami

Fear is the path to the dark side.
Yoda's quote never rang more true for me than two years ago in South Miami. One day I was walking (admittedly at a time and place that's less than desirable) from the metro rail to my friend's apartment. At any rate, there's this guy in front of me, also walking in this poorly lit area. We're heading in the same direction, but he has a brisk pace, as I am, because like I mentioned this is not the time and place for a leisurely stroll. All of a sudden, he kind of slows up, not something I paid much attention to, but I keep up my pace. As I'm about to pass him on the sidewalk, he spins around all of a sudden and pulls a knife on me. I don't really have time to react other than putting my hands up. Just as quickly, he lets out a sigh of relief, and says "I thought you were someone else." Not exactly wanting to ask this nutjob why he was just randomly carrying a knife, or wait for whoever I was "supposed" to be to show up, I just walked ahead of him and got the hell out of there. By the next day, I pretty much forgot all about it.
The reason I thought about this now is another event, this one happened the other day. It's late at night, and I'm in need of a taxi. I didn't really feel like calling one and waiting forever, so when I saw a taxi just randomly driving, I sort of run after it. The taxi picks up speed for a little while, which pissed me off. The taxi finally slows down, and rolls down the window a crack. The driver (a woman) just starts grilling me, and I'm there sort of like, "Are you gonna give me a ride or what?" She explained afterward how she doesn't usually pick up people at that time of night in this specific part of town.
Fear is the most dangerous emotion. It makes people do things they would never normally do, out of desperation. It puts you on the verge of stabbing some random pedestrian, or driving off on someone who needs your help. It's why cops shoot at a guy for holding a cell phone, or eating a pear. I had considered getting a burner myself, for "protection." As it turns out, what I really wanted the gun for was my own fear. People claim that they aren't afraid of anything, but that couldn't be further from the truth. Everyone has something to lose, and if not, you probably don't need a gun. We all are also afraid of encountering something we don't understand. Imagine if I actually had a gun that night, walking in South Miami; it would have been a much scarier situation for the both of us. And for no reason other than fear, one man with a gun and another with a knife, who both just wanted to get home, would have been thrust into a life or death situation they weren't anticipating. I don't relish the thought of possibly shooting someone for no reason, and would take less pleasure in getting stabbed when I'm just trying to go to sleep. The track "Thieves in the Night" by Blackstar sort of threw things into perspective for me. Although I consider Kweli and Mos two of the best MCs right now, I admit that I haven't bought any of their albums. They are known for dropping gems though, and this track spoke to me, particularly Dante's. I've long since the knife incident decided not to get the gun; I suppose the money would be better used supporting people who make music like this.



Currently listening to:
"Thieves in the Night" from
Mos Def and Talib Kweli are Black Star
Black Star